Melaka..

Went back to Melaka on the 2nd day of Chinese New Year. It takes only 2 hours ++ to reach there cause not jam at all :D Just when i stepped in the house, MUAHAHAHA angpau's!!!! =D Nothing special... Just go visit visit visit on the 1st day in Melaka.. I wore a black sleeveless top with jeans in the morning, and then change into T-shirt ans red nichii shorts in the evening. No pics la haha too busy XD and i'm eating eating eating the whole day. GOSH I AM SO FAT ALREADY.

2nd day didn't really do anything.. Stay at house and play cards with my cousins XD Ling finally cut her hair BUT still damn LONG. Hah.. Jia Yi grew taller d la.. Everyone is comparing me with her.. I am only one month older than her and she is like erm... hom many cm taller than me! And it is so so so obvious that i am SHORT! Grrrrrrr... Shorty me >:*( Wore a blouse and mini-skirt today.. Dont really like wearing that cause i am a chu lu girl. Haha. And i like bathing there! The weather is super hot and the water is super icy! Damn syiok. xD Played hide and seek with cousin sis.. Haha.. feeling a little bit childish.. But i hid in a place for damn long but no one found me.. So sien there so i took a pic.. Haha

3rd day, last day. Actually mummy is planning to stay there for 4 days, but my bro say his legs pain so have to go see doctor. WHAT?! STUPID. Sendiri tak tau jaga himself.. Have to go back one day earlier... :( :( :( So went to the temple in the early morning, have breakfast after that and then went back home.

This year is not so fun compared to last year, but i still enjoy being with my family and my cousins.. Love them lots :)

shiyi shiyi shiyi <3>

Happy Chinese New Year!

YAY! New Year is coming. I am very very very happy because:


1. No School

2. Can play til late night XD

3. Oh! Lots of fooooood!

4. Angpau's!

5. Family gathering

6. Can finally wear my new clothes!

7. Can go back to Malacca

8. This new year is going to be special :)



SEE? Me love new year! =D Have fun everyone.

HAPPY CHINESE NEW YEAR!

Now I am sad. ;(

I told myself that maybe because there are too many flyers, or maybe I didn't perform well during the audition. But now, I am quite sure that it is that i am not GOOD ENOUGH. That's why I'm really depressed, bacause i gave in my best (after pmr... yeah) i do sit-ups every night (on my bed HAHA), train flexibility as often as i can, strength works and bla bla bla. I dont know why i cant be chosen. Issit that i did not try hard enough, or just that i am not good enough?

Somehow, i feel like quiting. Studies are so stressful now for form 4. I dont know how to choose since my everything clashes with my everything. Before this it is harder to decide, but because i am not in, somehow it feels easier to choose. Just choose the more important one, easy enough right?

Brother kept on saying no you should not give up. But i cant see why i couldn't. I know people may think that i claim that i tried my very best but actually i didn't. You never know if i do my strength works til late night do you? You never know how happy i was last saturday when i went up the stunts so smoothly. Because you weren't there watching. I know i am bad, but frankly speaking, aren't you? My commitment didn't bring me anything at all. I dont think the time wasted is worth this. I AM SAD.

Bahhh, should i do my strength works tonight???? Maybe, maybe not...

She is really sad.

Yes i am stupid

I promise not to. But i broke my promises and, i am not sorry.



Was a bit shock i am not very sad bacause of their choice. I promise i wont cry and i didn't. People tell me that i must be strong. So i will be strong. Who cares if you work so hard and didnt get what you deserve?



But it is worse if you are not being loved. And seriuosly i feel that I AM NOT BEING LOVED. Well well who cares rite? I am always the one to blame, to be scolded stupid, to shout at. No matter what i say, how i explain, how innocent i am or what i do, no one will accept. Cause they'll say:" You stupid la. Its your fault your fault YOUR FAULT."



Yeah yeah i am stupid , the most stupid one. HAPPY?

4S9! =[

Omg i am in 4S9 this year! :(



Not that i dont like to be 9 or something, i saw the name list and i got Jia Ying, 1 close friend only! :*( Who am i gonna talk to this year? Anyway i am so happy cause Jia Ying promised me she will sit with me. Yay! :D Thank you dear! Luckily she asked me, if not i really dont know who am i gonna sit with!



Xue Ying's class is so far, and Yi Leng is not same class with me! :*( So sad la! Really hope i can know all my classmates fast enough! And really hope that i can get those good good teacher, cause they'll teach me for 2 years!



I am so lucky to have Jia Ying! I am sure we will be very good classmate and seatmate. And closer friends! =D